Funny Sayings About Retirement
Anon 0 Age is only a number a cipher for the records. Think about retirement as being two six-month holidays per year.
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Funny Retirement Quotes Enjoy this selection of humorous retirement quotes that celebrate the joy of retirement but also the less glamorous sides to being retired.

. The best is yet to come. Shop funny retirement plan sayings posters and art prints created by independent artists from around the globe. - Bill Watterson.
Whether youre writing a retirement roast speech or just putting a funny note in a greeting card these are some hilarious ways to congratulate coworkers on retirement. Retirement is just a never-ending vacation. He must use it.
If you have negative thoughts about retirement go through these quotes and lets us help change the attitude. Now that youre retired you can binge-watch all those great Netflix shows. Old age is always fifteen years older than I am Oliver Wendell Holmes 2.
If you also want to know how you can make your retirement life blissful check out our retirement investment and other financial blogs to help you plan for it. -Retirement opens the gates of doing all the funny activities that you have wanted to do in the days of your job but could not fulfil those desires due to time constraints. Keep calm and have fun.
Its nice to get out of the rat race but you have to learn to get along with less cheese Gene Perret Spreading sheets sounds more appealing than a spreadsheet Unknown The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. So take time to read our funny retirement speech jokes. What do you call a person who is happy on Monday.
You are only young once but you can stay immature indefinitely. Funny Retirement Quotes The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. Use the links below to jump to a particular section or scroll down the page to read all the retirement quotes and sayings.
Here are Funny Retirement Sayings for Cards. I thought we were just all excited you were getting new tires on your car. 2 Old age fragile bones doctor visits medical checkups and a weak bladder are you still looking forward to retirement.
Funny Farewell Inspiring Funny One-liners Card Messages. His men would follow him anywhere but only out of morbid curiosity. Abe Lemons 0 Happiness is being retired and spending all of my kids inheritance before I die.
I couldnt be happier unless of course I was the one retiring. It is a retired person. Old age is like everything else.
The idea of never using your alarm clock after decades of service life can be exasperating. Soni It is better to live rich than to die rich. I have a lot of years left before I retire but I will gladly take pointers from you.
Robert Benchley Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. Funny Quotes About Retirement Age is an issue of mind over matter. - Unknown When some people retire its going to be mighty hard to be able to tell the difference.
Retirement is when you will finally curse yourself for using an important deadline at work as an excuse for not taking care of your body all these years Unknown 6Congratulations on retiring. If you dont mind it doesnt matter Mark Twain Retirement. - Virginia Graham Theres never enough time to do all the nothing you want.
She got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasnt watching. Its doing nothing without worrying about. Have fun watching your lifes savings dwindle out Unknown 7My parents didnt want to move to Florida but they turned sixty and thats the law.
Now that youre done with your other job you can go back to your main job- annoying me 247. This man has delusions of adequacy. Funny Retirement Quotes 1.
Thats when you return from work one day and say Hi honey Im home forever Gene Perret Retirement is the worlds longest coffee break Author Unknown When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance his colleagues generally present him with a watch RC. Funny Retirement Sayings Also Suitable for Appraisals He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle. This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
Retirement means No Alarms No commute and No Problems. Funny Retirement Quotes Retirement. Retirement is like coming home one day and telling your wife honey Im home for good.
And if you ever miss your workplace I can be your boss for free. When you quit working just before your heart does. You cant help getting older but you dont have to get old George Burns 4.
The trouble with retirement is that you dont get a day off. Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did. Make a retiring colleague laugh with these funny quotes about retirement.
We print the highest quality funny retirement plan sayings posters and art prints on the internet. Retirement is Hello Pension and bye tension. Funny Retirement Quotes for your Friend Even though you hate this job you will miss it right.
To make a success of it youve got to start young Theodore Roosevelt 3. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge. Funny Retirement Quotes.
Unknown Author I always arrive late at the office but I make up for it by leaving early. While were meeting deadlines youll be meeting friends on the golf course. We only hate you a little.
But Im still happy-ish for you. Behind every retired man it is a woman hoping him to go back to work. Funny Retirement Messages For Husband.
Share this quote on Facebook Send via Mail A new life awaits. 1 Retirement is the beginning of the time when you can sit back and give advice to others even though you never followed it in your own life. Retirement takes all the meaning out of weekends.
I know you will have a rocking time with retired life. Abe Lemons 65 tips for a healthy wealthy and happy retirement. Dear husband congratulations on your new-found freedom.
A man cant retire his experience. The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. Retirement is like just.
-Retirement can be funny and terrifying at the same time. Retirement is waking up in the morning with nothing to do and by bedtime having done only half of it. The best part about retirement is that you dont have to worry about getting caught for doing nothing.
Baruch 0 Retirement kills more people than hard work ever did. No job no stress no pay Unknown Retire from work but not from life MK. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.
Unknown Author Im retired goodbye tension hello pension. Happiness isnever having to use another work acronym.
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